Grief and Loss

When we love, we experience attachment to others.

Death is the language of love. I would change the word from Death to “Grief.”

There are so many levels of grief and loss, whether it is the loss of a child, a parent, a possible job opportunity, the presence of unwanted cancer cells, the loss of a relationship, or the loss of an income.

Grief and loss come and go in “waves,” much like the ocean.

Sometimes, grief and loss surface to the top with a familiar smell or fragrance of a loved one who has passed. Seeing a favorite flower. Smelling a favorite cologne and catching the whiff of a favorite roast from the kitchen.

It’s hard navigating grief and loss.

The feelings and emotions are so real. They are so authentic. They come, and they go, but you don’t know how.

You can’t identify the pattern, and sometimes, you are confused about why you are crying like a baby and seem unable to stop.

Grief and loss can evoke feelings of anxiety, being overwhelmed, not knowing where to turn next or who to reach out to.

When grief and loss are present, the days are shifting. Sometimes, it can feel like quick sand. There is no ground that is felt; your feet may feel like they are dangling on the side of the pier. Sometimes, it is hard to breathe, and you may feel like you cannot take a deep breath. It is moment by moment, minute by minute, hour by hour. A smell can trigger a memory, a favorite restaurant or a place can trigger grief and a memory. I often talk about the ocean, and how the waves can mimic a tsunami at times when we are experiencing grief and loss.

Counseling can and does help in the healing process.

It provides a way to navigate the labyrinth of emotions you can’t identify, understand, or know where to put them or if you should hold them.

My own journey started when I was seven years old and lost my mom on a February day. I understand the struggle.

The difficulty that one faces with loss is that it is so “close to home.”

Some years are easier than others. Sometimes, when I go to the cemetery, I catch my mom up to date on what is happening with me. The cemetery is not for everyone. For some, it is a place of healing. For some, it is a place of fear, a place of the unknown, or a place of weeping. Whichever is true for you, one thing I know is there’s power in this – the power of presence, the power of silence, and the power of community as you walk through grief and loss.

In my experience as a counselor, healing and therapy don’t happen with one person only. Therapy is a connection with someone who you identify and learn to build trust with. When we discuss delicate matters of the heart, it is a sacred and intimate space. Therapy entails showing up together in those spaces to support healing, grief and restoration where possible. My approach is to begin where the client wants to start.

I would be privileged to walk you through your journey.

“So, what’s next? What are my options?”

You could send one email to me, or send a text stating you saw the website, or a brief introductory phone call could be the first step. You may think,“I’m doing ok, this loss and grief shouldn’t be that big of a deal. How can counseling help really?”

Taking one step is enough to move forward in getting the help and support you are looking for. Step by step. It is a process. It is a journey.

I offer a free 15-minute consultation to see if I would be a “good fit” for you. Call or email me today.

There is no pressure at all during this call. Sometimes, people just want to call and ask me a few questions they have. Questions are always welcome. They may need to think about their decision; it is a big decision and that is totally fine with me.